Heart Dreaming

I said goodbye to you Babe

My heart was broken and you were part of that

I did a lot of healing and growing

Didn't let anyone in but my friends

Then I was ready to try again

This time without all the pain

I wanted more than I did before

Still not traditional but I wasn't scared to feel again

I met someone that reminded me of you

I missed you so damn much and broke my rule

I reached out one night after my defenses were low

I knew it was a mistake but I did it anyway again and again

I let you back in to my life knowing how badly it went last time

I no longer kept my mouth shut and told you exactly what I expected

You backed off immediately when I showed you my true self

You know longer wanted to see me but still keep me in your life

I tried to walk away again but you wouldn't allow it

I'm not sure why you want me around as its clear you don't like the true me

It didn't take long to realize it would never be the same again

I no longer trust you with my heart 

You no longer like me as I am

So it should be easy to walk away

Somehow the hold over me will not break

I think I'm ready now to feel the things you made me feel before

I just cannot seem to find it again with someone else

So I keep reaching for something that just is not there

It is tearing my heart apart but I cannot seem to break free

I'm trying to put you in a friend area that doesn't hurt so bad

I'm trying to stop wanting what doesn't exist with you

To put our relationship in perspective

I wont let you break me again

It is not even your fault and I am alone in how I feel

Your only sin is pretending that at one time you did have feelings

I think it would be better if you were just honest with me

Then maybe my heart would stop creating a world where you feel the same

I guess I'm still the girl foolish enough to care